Nifty noodles/Fiddler's Green Easter
3/31/02
Denver, Colo
Sunday 3/31/02 Easter

Fiddlers Green amphitheater. Brought to you by Cherry Hills Church. Best Easter service I can remember attending. 15,000 at a ten oclock service. I played throughout the event with a full band, five piece horn section and 250 voice Choir. It was fantastic! We opened the service with "I'd Like To Thank You Jesus" then I left stage and they continued on in praise and worship music. I came back and did an old song I wrote twelve years ago..."We All Need" It felt like I wrote it yesterday. At offering time I finished my part of the event with "Maybe I'm Amazed". I was amazed too at how well I fit the day.

For the first time in many years I felt like a real part of the whole body of believers. Found myself singing with the choir from off stage cause it was so funky. The Choir was very enthusiastic. So much so that it rubbed off.

Got a complimentary jacket from "House of Blues" also on the concert sight. Hung out afterward with Robby Marshall.. Long time friend and promoter (and fellow lunatic) who introduced me to a new group "Reverend Leon's Revival". lead singer is a minister at a church called "Scum of the Earth".... Only in Denver.

I hope to play again out here with the Reverend Leon, who does funky covers of when the Saints go Marching In and other old time favorites... Along with his own stuff. And some interesting versions of old Rolling Stones tunes. It just sounds cool. "You've heard of seeker sensitive" the reverend comments on his church ... "our church is DOUBTER sensitive". I like it!

They were passing out free boxes of Krispy Kreme's after the Easter service. It beat eggs!

O.K. So there's THAT bryan d

Nifty noodles/ Good Friday
3/29/02
Rancho Santa Fe, CA
Horizon Fellowship North County
I coulda been used more effectively I think. Noon service and a night service. Sung well. Just three songs and on the night gig two songs at the end. My songs don't quite fit the Easter story specifically. Rancho Santa Fe is among the wealthiest communities in the world. Lot of big spreads here. The crowd at church didn't seem like the wealthy folks though except maybe spiritually.

No room to be personal really during this event. I tried to share something more "purposeful". I just got lost trying to be serious. Better to just sing the songs and be a part of the service. Sound was not very good but nobody noticed. I miss doing a whole show. Especially when people ask afterward... "you playing anywhere where we can hear more of your stuff" ... "Not anywhere close anytime soon" I say.

O.K. So there's That... Bryan d

Nifty noodles/ nothing happened
3/24/02
Riverside, CA
Sunday
As in any life, mine, this weekend, was filled with the typically normal ups and downs of everyday living.

It did not require an audience of any kind. Nor was one present to see my attempts to decipher the experience.

Small decisions presented themselves regularly every hour of the day.

I made choices worthy of an award though none shall be given.

Only God saw the intent of my heart through my many mistakes.

I did recognize the small gifts that God hides like Easter eggs in a crowded park.

Joy, and sadness and boredom were arranged like flowers in a vase around my heart. A vase, placed on a table in a room full of roses where nobody else would notice the simplicity of daisies.

I wasn't effective at anything this weekend. I was just.... Here!. Which in it's own way is quite remarkable.

O.K. Sooooo there's THAT! bryan d

Nifty noodles/ Recommended
3/21/02
Riverside, CA
At Home
I've been listening to one album the last week as I drive around town. I listen to it everyday. It does wonders for me musically and spiritually. Usually I have to sacrifice one for the other.

The record? "Second Skin" by Ashley Cleveland. Favorite cuts: #3 Land of The Living-(worship oriented blues/ Bonnie Riatt style) she sings "I would have lost all heart/ if I did not believe /in the goodness of my God" #8) "What it Takes" (is a man and a woman willing) a recovery oriented song in the style of Sheryl Crow only happier. #9 "The Damage Done", written by Neil Young just soothes my soul. #10 (My theme song for the present)..." Don't Let Me Fall Too Far" Ashley sings here."I keep my distance from the one who loves me the most"

The other songs are great too.. Honorable mention is "Faith Like a Little Child".

Most interesting line: "the glass is dark, chipped on the rim" a new way of looking at the scripture about seeing through the glass darkly. A drinkers perspective.

Ashley is a recovering alcoholic with five years of sobriety. She has the voice of "experience". The sound of her voice is the real thing too and the phrasing is the way I hear things too.

O.K. So there's That! bryan d

Nifty noodles/ Hey 49!
3/16/02
Sacramento, CA
I celebrated my birthday at Denny's with a hamburger and a free ice cream sundae. I tried to tell 'em I was 65 so I could qualify for that senior discount. I guess it was a compliment that they weren't convinced. My sound man and I had to fly up Saturday night to do Sunday morning services at Discovery Church in Elk Grove. I got lots of calls though from friends and e mails I couldn't read till I was home and plugged in to the web. My favorite gift came from Holly and Pam at Streetlevel... One share of stock in Krespe Kreme! ... My worries are over!

The first service was packed. I was presented with a birthday cake. I wore a green striped tie over my knit sweater... It was St Patrick's day ya know... "I've got Irish roots" I told em... "in fact my mom called me 'Oh Bryan!' as far back as I can remember in a kind of irritated tone of voice". I opened with "It Gets Better" and dedicated it to me as my birthday song.

After a few up things... I launched into "If You Pray For Me". The sermon was based on our relationship attitudes from T.V. Shows like "the weakest link" and "elimidate". Discovery is a seeker sensitive church and it's very entertaining. There were many wiping there eyes though as I sang "I need to know he hears my prayers and that he cares for me" I quoted the whole Serenity Prayer showing how much Jesus was always meant to be in the center of the 12 step recovery program. "taking as Jesus did this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it" "There is the biggest source of my anger in life right there". I said. I've hated the fact too that I have been the weakest link in most of the relationships in my life. Easier to sing to people from a distance than to risk being shot at from close range. I have a deep fear of powder burns!

There were many wonderful folks at this church. I was exhausted by the time we returned to the airport in the rental car. This is where I need the most prayer... This is where I feel the most lonely. When the gig is over and the intensity comes to an abrupt halt. There is an unmistakable vacuum in the hours following every event. It has some relief in it but the rushing waters of the Red Sea begin to close in around my ankles as thoughts of my own real life begin to return. I have work to do! I need to take a stand against my "back row attitude" about faith and what God wants in my life. I'm 49. I should be leading by example by now.

I want to leave you with something a read in Psalms 49 from the message Bible. "there's no such thing as self rescue! pulling yourself up by your bootstraps, the cost of rescue is beyond our means and even than it doesn't guarantee life forever or insurance against the black hole" ( I took that to mean those sink holes in our emotions)

God will continue to be my only hope to be known and understood and loved. He is showing me where he is and who he is in! Thank all of you for the birthday wishes and prayers. They mean a lot.

O.K. So there's that! bryan d

Nifty noodles/ Reconstruction
3/12/02
Nashville, TN
Tuesday...
(to the tune of Mickey Mouse) Now it's time to say good bye to Diadem and friends... from B R Y A N.... I've been given the official word. Just 4 days from my 49th birthday, I am, for the first time since 1985 out of a contract. Dean Deil at Diadem called me saying they had a vision for making music for people over twenty five but they have exhausted their resources looking for a way to reach this audience to no avail. They still think Joyride is a great record but it hasn't reached it's mark. I too have no bitterness at the way the company went about their tasks. But clearly adults are scattered and they are not being drawn in by CCM radio. Chances are they're more interested in talk radio anyway.

I'm not sure where I go from here. But the time has come to redefine and reconstruct my life from the ground up. I don't want to live on past glories... "if memories were all I sang, I'd rather drive a truck"

I am still writing songs, I must find a whole new road. I'm not sad, I'm not worried. I just want the last 1/3 of my life to be productive in some way. To have a vision for a way to contribute with my abilities, To encourage others by what I have learned. And to belong somewhere.

Time marches on, Time waits for no man, It is time for me to be grateful for such a long run, Thankful for the gifts God has given me And to request his help in giving back with more fervor and passion than I've ever known.

God has loved me from the day I was born and he's kept me through all these years. I know he has a plan for me that will continue until I breath my last breath.

"trusting that he will make all things right if I surrender to his will" (From the Serenity Prayer).

I am facing a new frontier. I may finance my own record but that will take time. I may write for someone else as well... There's a book to write out there somewhere... And I'd love to do a radio show of my own. First and foremost though I will continue to sing to whomever will listen. I'll start with Recovery groups as I plan to lead a 12 step program in the future as I participate in my own recovery issues. I have found peace without popularity. Significance without Sales figures. It can only get better from here.

To whom it may concern, I love you so much, and thanks

O.K. So there's THAT Bryan E Duncan

Nifty noodles/ Tithing my Time
3/10/02
Santa Cruz, CA
Celebrate Recovery at Bible Church
The stage is a great place to hide I've decided. I always wondered why I liked being up there so much. It gives you a birds eye view of the world where you can make comments on pain in general without feeling it too much. I'm fine when I have everyone's undivided attention. So no wonder I love singin' It gives me a way to feel loved and feel strong and in control and understood. Of course it has stunted my growth in many ways... (not literally! that wasn't my fault).

Spiritually it's not a place where I do any growing. So if I am not being "watered and fed" before I get there... Well I'm gonna be climbing a mighty tiny beanstalk!

I'm finding some new "awkwardness" on stage as I am pursuing new truth in my own life. I'm facing my own reconstruction (which by the way looks similar to "DEstruction") It's only different in the light of God's word and his intent. God has pulled off all the siding on my "house"... And I'm feeling a little embarrassed and uncomfortable.

I've decided that I'd rather be more effective than popular... If that makes sense to you. Popular is a people pleasing place. Effective in my case is a spiritual "God Pleasing" place. Contributing something besides entertainment, which we place high value on in this country. Movie stars verses Teachers and Preachers.

I am making connections with people in Celebrate Recovery that I have never experienced. It's a world of vulnerability in a safe environment. I have always lacked a sense of community, I've been determined to do my own thing most of the time... (not sure that's gonna change much either)

But I'm finding something I've needed for almost all my life. Love and acceptance... When the truth is known about me. When the secret is out and nobody runs away.

O.k. Sooooo there's THAT bryan d

Nifty noodles/ Grass Valley
3/1/02
Grass Valley
3/1/02 Friday Twenty five minutes followed by twenty minutes at the end and I'm done for the evening. A ten year celebration for a church that went from six families to a church of 1200 in ten years. They still don't have their own building. I played in the Veterans hall. It was quick like a part time job. Sound was killer and the music felt fine. The special speaker was a Bill Butterworth. " I know his mom" I told the crowd... "Mrs. Butterworth... is my favorite" Nothing further to say here.

O.K. So there's THAT bryan d

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